Tuesday, April 26, 2011

.password please.

Middle School Computer Lab

a teacher is putting in his password to log into his computer.

6th grader: "what if your password is 'ihavenogirlfriendshateme'"

.a simple request.

Lunch Room

making an announcement to a group of 6th grade girls

Me: "Hey ladies, just to let you know, it is raining outside so we are staying inside for the entire lunch hour."

6th graders (all): "AAAhhhhhh, come on!"

6th grader: "Mr. K, can we sacrifice you to Mother Nature."

Me: "No."

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

.mountains everywhere.

Working one on one with a student on Buddhism worksheets

(reading an section in the book about Buddha)

6th grader: "It says here Buddha supposedly lived in southern Nipple."

Me: "Nepal"

6th grader: "Oh, Nepal."

.hot snack.

Middle School Computer Lab

Teacher to a student: "You can't have those cheetos in here, you'll have to eat them outside."

6th grader: "Yeah, especial because they are 'flaming hot'. They could melt the computers."

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

.would you rather.

Lunch Table

6th grader 1: "Would you rather die a fiery death or a nice happy death?"

6th grader 2: "I don't know, probably a nice happy death."

6th grader 1: "But, you are a pyro maniac."

Me: "This changes everything."

(both students look at each other and laugh)


walking past a Kindergarten class

Teacher: "I didn't know you had two older sisters."

Kindergartener: "Yeah, they are dogs."

Teacher: "I see."

Thursday, April 14, 2011


Middle School Hallway

Me: "Have you seen my iPod?"

6th grader: "No.... This one time my sister was looking for my iPod and she looked in my pants and I was like 'what are you doing?!"

Me: "Talk about invasion of privacy."

6th grader: "Yeah, I know, right?!"

.step by step.

6th grade lunch table

6th grader: "I wore my pedometer to bed last night and I took 65 steps in my sleep."

Me: (interested) "Really?!"

6th grader: "I guess I move in my sleep."

Me: "I'll say."

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

.i see you.

Lunch Table

6th grader: "My personal trainer has a black belt in everything. Judo, Karate, Stick Fighting, Ninja, lots of stuff."

Me: "Wow."

6th grader: "He looks a lot different from his picture he has wrinkles in his picture, but in person he has real smooth skin. He has a small head and a big neck."

Me: "Wow."

6th grader: "He looks like someone who would watch you from a tall building."

Me: "Like a super hero?"

6th grader: "No, like a 'I see you down there and I'm gonna get you' person."

Me: (smiling)

6th grader: "He showed me this Youtube video of him flipping over these blue foam bricks. He landed on his hands!!"